Sample peer review

For: Josh Germinal, "Dump Microsoft: Install Linux!"

Written by Teddy Stunner: 309-836-1454, td-stunner@wiu.edu. Call me if you have questions!

I like the positive stuff a lot---you do a nice job of showing how much you like using Linux, building your ethos as an expert, but also showing that you haven't forgotten that some folks really have a hard time with computers. I also like the way you mix stories of your installation of Linux and point out that the process can be reversed.

I also like the confident first-person tone. Using examples about how you use Linux to do schoolwork helps, as does pointing out the software which can take the place of Photoshop and Dreamweaver.

Great title!

Some suggestions for making this better:

In some spots, I think you need to slow down and add details. For example, you write that a big hard drive helps: how big? You mention using a USB drive: is that necessary? You suggest trying Linux with a Live CD: does that work on a DVD player? In other words, think about the things that you know which I don't. I can point out more if you like.
Don't forget to how-to: tell folks how to do the things you suggest, and relate every paragraph to an informative purpose. At times you just talk about why Linux is better. How can that help the how-to?
In class last week we talked about balancing public and private associations. I think your experience with the corrupted Word files and the crashing Windows sounds awful, but you could do a better job explaining this "private" problem to a "public" audience.
There's a lot of terminology here. Do you need it all, or can more general language suffice? When you do use terms, explain them the first time. I think this can be just a few words for each term.
You talk about choosing a "distribution" of Linux and give some background about it. However, I think this is confusing. You should consider just picking one distribution, for the purposes of the how to. If people do it they can try others. This will let you provide more detail about the install process. Remember that focus is important.
Make sure your claims add up. For example, at the end of your first paragraph, you write that "Anyone can install Linux" but then you write that "Some computers may not be able to handle it." Which is it?
Great beginning. But you don't really have an end. Maybe talk about future steps?
I think you are a little off on MLA format. Is the title supposed to be bigger? Are there supposed to be spaces between paragraphs?

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